DUDE, SERIOUSLY THAT’S NOT FUNNY – Pakistani Taliban leader Hakimullah Mehsud was all laughs about deadly U.S. airstrikes during an interview with reporters Sunday. It was his first appearance since becoming the leader of the militant group, dispelling

rumors that he had been killed in a U.S. attack. Mehsud used the words “love and affection” to describe the Taliban’s relationship with al-Qaida. Osama bin Laden and his accomplices are suspected to be hiding out in territory controlled by Mehsud. The militant leader vowed

retaliation against U.S. and Pakistani air strikes that killed several of his allies. The militant reported his forces are prepared to attack any offensive moves by Pakistani military in the Swat Valley and South Waziristan.

WHAT ABOUT OUR NEEDS? – Saudi Arabia says oil-producing nations should receive financial aid (you, know – like a bail out) if climate-friendly treaties call for a reduction in fossil fuel use. The new climate pact would cost

Saudi Arabia $19 billion a year, according to the Saudi delegation. Hmmm… the International Energy Agency says no, even with these pacts OPEC revenues would quadruple from 2008-2030, a $23 trillion increase.

Saudi Arabia claims they are an “economically vulnerable” country, and that the IEA’s numbers are “biased.”

$1.4 TRILLION A BIT MUCH – Fed Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke finally stepped in today and told Congress and the President that just perhaps a $1.4 trillion deficit won’t cut it,

or said another way, has to be cut. Big Ben was speaking to a Fed conference in Santa Barbara, and he made it clear that these deficits were hurting the economy.

ALL RIGHT WITH THE WORLD AGAIN – The Detroit Lions, the NFL team that led the league with the record number of 19 straight defeats until their first victory last week, lost again to the Pittsburgh Steelers yesterday, regaining their losing ways. The Lions took

an early lead over Jay Cutler and boys from Steeltown, but then the Steelers got untracked and took off. Final score: Steelers 48, Lions 24. The loss reassures people that there is an exception that proves the rule and now the world

is no longer turned upside down. The Lions are showing some life, however, and many are thinking they may win three, maybe four games this year.

KISS IT GOODBYE – CIT Group, Inc, the commercial lender that took a $2.3 billion bailout from the American taxpayers a year ago, yesterday filed for bankruptcy in New York and basically told the U.S. government that it could

kiss that money goodbye. The bankruptcy came after bondholders refused a deal to screw them out of their money, and decided to take their chance in court. All this happened while

Ford, the car company that refused to take a cent of bailout money, announced a $1 billion profit for last quarter. Moral of the story: bailouts are for losers.

WOW WHAT A RIDE! – A passenger flying on an Air Force plane in South Africa grabbed the wrong lever and accidentially ejected himself for the plane during a manuever during a joy ride. Capt. Gerhard Lourens lost his passenger when the seat

behind him ejected from a Silver Falcons Pilatus PC-7 Astra during the sortie near Langebaanweg Air Force Base, 80 miles north of Capetown. The plane is part of the air force display team, much like our Blue Angels. The passenger, to this point

unidentified, floated to the ground after his parachute opened automatically and he was picked up by an air force helicopter. Experts say he was lucky to be alive. No comment from the astonished pilot.

BAD EMPLOYEE MORAL – Police report a Blockbuster employee stabbed himself in the leg to miss his work shift. Aaron Siebers, 29, claimed three men attacked him. Police launched a five-agency manhunt to search for the attackers, except they were fake. Siebers

said the attack took place outside of a Target store; however, security cameras don’t show an attack. Another camera shows Siebers near the Blockbuster store, but he wasn’t limping. Siebers admitted to the concocted story when police arrived at the hospital where he

was receiving stitches for his deep wound. Siebers was charged with false reporting and obstructing police and was taken to the county jail.

MIGHT WANT TO CHECK THE BODY – A Brazilian man reportedly killed in a car crash showed up at his own funeral, wanting to know what the rush was all about. Ademir Jorge Goncalves, 59, arrived to the astonished mourners half way through

his funeral, saying he had been at a truck stop drinking with friends all night. Gonalves was presumed dead from a car crash. His relatives had identified the body the night before, with some misgivings, but went ahead with the funeral, because

“what were we to do?” The man got the word that he was dead the next morning and rushed to the cemetery to stop the funeral. The dead man was then properly identified and will be given a second funeral.

AWFUL OCTOBER – 80’s fashion is coming back around, and so are 80’s unemployment rates. The jobless rate has reached a whopping 10.2%, the highest since 1983. With 190,000 jobs lost in October, the number of unemployed is now 15.7 million, and

economists are saying there’s more to come. Because employers aren’t exactly itching to hire, experts say the unemployment rate could reach 10.5% by next year (which isn’t far off, by the way). Those taking a glass-half-full approach are making note of the 34,000

part-time and temporary jobs filled, without which the unemployment rate would be 17.5% Even so, we keep hearing how the recession has ended. Hmmm…not so much.